Real men engage

This is a post i was priveleged to write a couple weeks back for the Finding Manhood blog.

The best advice I have received in while, “Be more interested and less interesting”.

What a novel concept! Quick to listen, slow to speak…seems like I’ve heard this somewhere before.

For some reason, that little phrase stuck with me, and I immediately took it to heart. I think most men pride themselves in being interesting. Whether it’s my job, my hobbies, what my family does on the weekends or my knowledge about a particular subject, I find myself wanting to be the one who people say, “that’s interesting” to.

When I catch myself being reminded of this it often reveals in me a deeper truth about who I am as a person. Although, I know the world doesn’t actually revolved around me, I find myself having conversation like it does. However, when I converse and live by this rule, conversation and friendship becomes so much more freeing.

This small act of selflessness requires me to not bring up that “little known fact” just because the conversation is in a lull. It requires me to think of questions that probe and challenge and motivate. It requires me to view people as actually made in the image of God. It’s as if we all have this little piece of God inside of us — Christians or not. It becomes a much more interesting conversation when you ask yourself, “Which piece of God do they have and how can I get them to tell me about it?”

Maybe you don’t have a problem listening. That’s kind of what we do as husbands/men — listen. Sure being more interested is about listening, but it’s just as much about engaging.

Listening is easy. Engaging…now that sounds interesting.